Don't tell anyone, but...

The reason I'm really writing is to make a confession to you, my friends and family who read my silly blog.  And here it is....I'm a selfish person.  Some of you are chuckling, shaking your head, and laughing, all the while saying, "Well, DUH!!!!  We could've told you that."  But I'm serious.  Have you read my most recent Facebook entry?  Here it is...

"So, yesterday, I was talking to my mom about the snow. I said, "I hope the electricity doesn't go out. I'm not in the mood for that." ...And then I heard myself...and I thought about Haiti...and I was ashamed."

Can you believe the arrogance of that "I'm not in the mood" part???  NOT IN THE MOOD???  Seriously, I'm thinking that one Tueday morning, back a few weeks ago now, some sweet mother in Haiti woke up, looked around at her digs, felt bored at the upcoming daily grind, and thought, "Gee, I'd like to shake things up a little.  Today would be a GREAT day for an earthquake!"  NOT!  No one in Haiti is in the mood to deal with the things they're coping with. 

The gall of ME to think that my moods should be of any matter to God or the universe in general???

Just in the interest of being totally transparent here, I'll share another great example.  Our church has something called the Levite ministry.  Basically it means you get to clean the church.  When I realized that it was our turn to clean the church, I threw a mini-pity-party.  Again, I just wasn't in the mood.  I had other, "more important" things to do. 

While I was taking a shower getting ready to go into town, God spoke to me.  (WHAT?  Doesn't God speak to YOU while you're in the shower???)  Basically He let me know that I was a hypocrite.  See, I want... no scratch that... I LONG for God to use me.  But I want Him to use me on MY terms.  I want Him to use me for something wonderful, something important (Right?  Don't we all?).  Cleaning the church?  That's evidently just a little too ordinary and mundane.   I won't lie.  My attitude didn't get better immediately.  It's taken some time for that revelation to seep into my heart.  You know, the whole "He who is faithful with little..." idea?  You can ask me after my next turn to clean the church whether this little revelation has really stuck or not.  We'll see...

Anyway, I hope you don't think too much less of me.  I'm sure you had NO CLUE I had these kinds of glaring faults, right????  Don't laugh!!

On a more serious note  (and to distract you from laughing at me), maybe you noticed the two "buttons" I added to my sidebar. One is for "Amazima", a ministry in Uganda that I recently found while I was doing some research about world orphans.  The other button is for the non-profit ministry "147 Million Orphans" which helps to raise money and awareness for orphans. I believe it's actually a sister organization for Amazima. Click on them and take a look. Good stuff there.