Katy Lu has been gone for 18 years now. Well, that's not really true. Perhaps she has been absent bodily, but she's not gone.
She lives right here...in this house, in this crazy, large, diverse family that she taught us to want.
She lives...in the decisions I make that would have been made differently if she had never been.
She lives...in the love I feel for children who have special needs.
She lives...in the compassion I feel for mommas who lose their babies (and not-so-babies).
She lives...in the insane and unreasonable fear (that never leaves me) that I will lose another child somehow. (Just being real, here.)
She lives...in my desire to make sure that NO CHILD EVER has to endure loneliness or the pain of being unloved.
She lives...yes she does...in the way that only one who has made an immeasureable difference in this world can continue to live even after she is gone. She lives in me, in Harold, and in this family that her influence had such a HUGE part in building, even though she never got to utter her first word.
This was the day 18 years ago that she changed her address from my home to my heart. Even though I miss her every day, even after all this time, I know that she really never left and I can't express the comfort that that brings.
I am so grateful that she came, even for so short a time. I wouldn't change a thing. I know that God used every second of her 5 1/2 months to His glory and His purposes, and I am so privileged to have been part of her life.
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